Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
we're so committed to being not committed
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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