Slut skills are useful in every country.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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