Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
