i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
