I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I FOUND THE LEGS
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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