Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize