the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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