So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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