i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize