Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
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