I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
