So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
