And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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