i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
