He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
