sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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