"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Randomize
