yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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