bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Randomize
