pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
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