I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
This toilet bowl is my home.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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