do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
