Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
