I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
