He is an equal opportunity slut.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
