U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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