I like my sex mixed with concussions.
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
