does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Go christen that room with your naked body.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Randomize
