he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
the day after is always just damage control
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
