i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
