she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize