So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
This is my life. Enjoy the view
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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