I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
