HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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