I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
And then my night got REAL pukey
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize