so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
