I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Randomize
