I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
