The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
