About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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