This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
