I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize