ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
