question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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