he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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