Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
