WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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