But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
