: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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