I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Drunk is not a location!
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
