i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
