i love accidental penises.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Princesses don't give blow jobs
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
